Not Your Sweetie

BREAKING NEWS: KISSINGER OUT, LAW IN!

December 14, 2002 6: 13 AM

Moonie Moon News Service

By Carolyn Kay

The White House: President Bush today announced that he would name
Cardinal Bernard Law to replace Henry Kissinger, who yesterday resigned
his position on the commission to study the 9/11 disaster. "I wanted
someone with a proven record in coverups," Bush said. "Cardinal Law is
that man."

Law's threat to have the ultrawealthy Boston Roman Catholic Archdiocese
declare itself bankrupt to avoid paying claims to the victims of
sexually abusive priests may have planted doubts in President Bush as to
whether Henry Kissinger was the best bald-faced liar for the 9/11
inquiry commission. An official in the Bush administration who refused
to be named, but whom the President calls "Domehead" admitted that is
the real reason for Kissinger's resignation.

Law is available for the position, as yesterday he resigned his job
running the archdiocese of Boston, though he will retain the title of
cardinal. "I'm very please that President Bush chose me," said Law. "I
was beginning to feel unwanted."

"I like his red hat," Bush said.